Dances With Pork Chops
by Smile-I'mTheEndOfAllThatYouSee
Summary: Pork Chops as dance partners? Dances gone wrong? Freddie standing up to Sam? What is going on here? Read it in my ten song challenge! Discaimer: I don't own songs or show


**Okay, after reading Imatotalfreaksowhat's ten song challenge fic. I was inspired to do my own. The rules are to put your iPod on shuffle and use the first ten songs as drabbles with at least 2 lines from the song incorporated into the drabble. Make sure to give the title of the song and the artist in front of the drabble. I sort of cheated on mine since I didn't use the first ten songs because I wanted to keep this funny and rated K. Enjoy. Lyrics are in bold.**

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><p><strong>Wind It Up by: Gwen Stefani<strong>

It was the annual Ridgeway School Dance – the third big dance (Homecoming being second and Prom being first) of the school year. Sam Puckett dressed in a simple and plain blue dress watched a group of cute boys, wanting to ask one of them to dance but not sure how to.

Carly, dressed in a beautiful purple dress, and Wendy, dressed in a sunshine yellow dress had just finished dancing with their dates when they saw Sam. "Hey, Sam!" Carly called out. "You havin' fun?"

Without answering Carly's question, Sam asked, "Hey, Carly, Wendy, how do I ask one of those guys to dance with me without using brute force? Like what makes a guy want to dance with a girl?"

"**They like the way we dance, they like the way we work**," Wendy said.

"**You got to let the beat get under your skin. You got to open up and let it all in, but see, once it gets in, the popping begins. Then you'll find out why all the boys stare**," Carly said.

"Okay! Thanks!" Sam said as she headed for the dance floor to try and get one of the guys to notice her dancing and perhaps dance with her.

"No problem, Sam," Carly said.

"Good luck!" Wendy called out.

So Sam danced every dance her old dance coach Ernie taught her, but none of the boys ever noticed her. Finally a slow dance came on. Sam saw Carly dancing with Lorenzo and Wendy dancing with Freddie. She also noticed that all of the boys have dance partners by now so instead of feeling dejected; Sam took out a BBQ pork chop from her purse and slow danced with it, earning a few crazy looks. However, Sam could not be happier as she took a bite out of her pork chop.

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><p><strong>Author's Note: Lorenzo is an OC of mine, first featured in my iCarly fancfic <em>Fake Friends, Real Friends<em>**

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><p><strong>You Shook Me All Night Long by: ACDC**

Spencer was at the Amazing Glaze waiting for his order of jelly filled doughnuts when he saw her.

Her

A girl with hair the color of sunshine and baby blue eyes. She wore skinny jeans and a spring sleeveless shirt with high heels. **She was a fast machine, kept her motor clean**.

_**Knocking me out with those American thighs**__, _Spencer thought as his jaw dropped. He so badly wanted to ask her out on a date. Before his mind could register what his feet were doing, he walked across the floor in some kind of love struck trance that could only be broken by the blonde-haired beauty.

Or so he thought.

Spencer walked across the wet floor, tripped, and landed on his back. To make matters worse, an employee with his order of doughnuts tripped over Spencer, sending flying jelly doughnuts to crash land on Spencer's head and face. The whole store laughed at him, including the girl.

Spencer never went back to the Amazing Glaze ever again.

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><p><strong>I Like To Move It (Erick More Club Mix) by: Reel 2 Real ft. The Mad Stuntman<strong>

"Now it's time for…" Carly was cut off by—

"RANDOM DANCING!"

However instead of the usual track that came on, "I Like to Move It" began to play so Carly and Sam began to sing.

"**I like to move it, move it!**" Carly sang.

"**I like to move it, move it!**" Sam sang.

Then Freddie turned the camera on himself and sang (badly), "**I like to move it, move it!**"

"Turn the camera back on us, Fredward!" Sam shouted and Freddie did so.

Then Spencer and Gibby popped out of nowhere, and Spencer sang, "**You like to**…"

"**MOVE IT!**" Gibby finished.

Sam broke out in break dancing and Gibby took off his shirt and danced his own style as Carly and Spencer danced by rubbing their stomachs like they did with Granddad. "Hey, Carly, what do you like to do?" Spencer asked.

"**I like to move it, move it**!" Carly answered with enthusiasm.

"What about you, Sam?" asked Spencer.

Sam temporarily stopped to shout, "**I like to move it, move it**!"

"Gibby?"

"**I like to move it, move it**!"

"And, Freddie, what about our viewers?"

Freddie turned the camera on himself this time, and sang, "**You like to move it**!" Then Freddie turned the camera back on Carly, Sam, Spencer, and Gibby and sat it down on his cart as he rushed off to dance with his friends on iCarly.

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><p><strong>In Love With A Girl by: Gavin DeGraw<strong>

Spencer was in love.

Unconditionally and forever in love as he tasted her and moaned in pleasure before feeling her insides with his tongue. _So this is what true love taste like, _Spencer thought, _because I'm in heaven. _Spencer gave her a love bite. "Darling, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me," he said, "I wish I can marry you." She didn't say anything as she was just content in fulfilling her purpose of making her man happy.

Just then Carly walked into the room.

Spencer looked up and said, "Oh, Carly, **I'm in love with a girl**, **and she **_**knows **_**how to treat a fellow right**."

Carly looked at her crazy older brother confusingly. "Okay, who?"

"With this spaghetti pizza I made. Best thing I ever created. Even better than spaghetti tacos," Spencer explained as he went back to tasting and eating up his "girlfriend."

Carly just walked to the couch shaking her head at her older brother's antics and grabbed for a slice herself.

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><p><strong>YMCA by: The Village People<strong>

In five, four, three, two, one," Freddie counted down.

"Hello, iCarly _aficionados_!" Carly greeted.

"And hello to all the _navegadores de la Red,_" greeted Sam.

"Hey, Sam,"

"Yeah, Carly?"

"**Did** **you know there's a place you can go when you're short on your dough?**"

"No, Carly. What place?"

"The YMCA of course! **They have everything that you need to enjoy. You can hang out with all the boys. It's fun to stay at the**…"

"**Y-M-C-A!"** Carly and Sam sang together as they did the YMCA dance. "**It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A!**"

"Take it away, Carly!"

"**You can get yourself clean; you can have a good meal. You can do whatever you feel** ..."

"**It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A! It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A!**" Carly and Sam sang and danced to for the next three minutes, creating a popularity boost for the YMCA.

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><p><strong>Pon de Replay by: Rihanna <strong>

Spencer was partying at a club with his new girlfriend Alexandra. Spencer was having an awesome time dancing while Alex stood by with her drink watching Spencer.

"Come on, Alex," Spencer pleaded, "dance with me."

"Spencer, I can't," Alex said with remorse.

"Why not?"

"I don't know how to dance," Alex confessed.

"Well, here I'll show you," Spencer said, offer Alex his hand.

"I don't know."

"Trust me. Take my hand."

Alex put down her drink and took Spencer's hand. "Well, okay."

Spencer positioned Alex in front of him. "Okay just follow my lead. **It goes 1 by 1 even 2 by 2. Let's go dip it low then you bring it up slow**." Alex and Spencer shook their bodies as they crouched to the floor but slowly came up again. Alex was doing very well. "Good, you're doing good. Now take my hand." Alex did what she was told. "**Wind it up 1 time**." Alex spun around. "**Wind it back once more**." Alex spun around again. "**And rock it til the grooves done**." Spencer continued to teach Alex how to dance until the song ended.

Alex was breathless. "Wow! I did it!"

"You did great, Alex!" Spencer congratulated.

"All thanks to you!" Spencer blushed.

"I'm going to use the bathroom, okay?" Spencer said.

"Sure." Spencer left, and Alex decided to try off her newly acquired dancing skills. Then Alex became brazen and decided to try the Firecracker her boyfriend showed her once. This was a huge mistake.

Spencer came back to a room filled with paramedics, clubbers with broken bones, and an unconscious girlfriend.

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><p><strong>Beat It by: Fall Out Boy ft. John Mayor<strong>

Freddie was never one for athletics, but when being chased by an angry, stampeding Sam, he could put all Olympic sprinters to shame.

"**You better run. You better do what you can**, Freddie, if you know what's good for you!" Sam shouted as she gained speed and chased Freddie. He should know better than to pull a prank like that on her.

Freddie sprinted across the hall of Ridgway, but then he came to a dead end, and Sam was gaining up on him. Freddie was scared out of his mind, but then a brave front rushed into Freddie. He was sick and tired of running from Sam. He was brave enough to pull a prank on her. Well then, he was brave enough to face her. _**You wanna be tough, better do what you can**__, Freddie, _Freddie thought to himself as he got in a fighting position.

Finally, a raging Sam caught up to Freddie and stopped short on her tracks. She curled up her fist and like a wolf about to lunge after its prey, Sam got ready to attack.

"Hold on! Wait, Sam!" Freddie begged.

Sam stopped but made no move to lower her fist. "What?" she growled.

Putting on his best brave voice, Freddie said, "I'm sick and tired of you harassing me and inflicting emotional and physical harm upon me. It's time you learned to take a joke when someone else pranks you. No. It's time you learned how it feels like to go through the same torment I go through. I'm gonna fight you. I'm not gonna run, but you can. **So beat it just beat it**, Sam."

Sam was silent for a moment, and Freddie thought he made a breakthrough. However, Sam just shrugged and punched him hard on the cheek. So hard that the impact caused Freddie to hit his head on the wall behind him and slowly sink to the ground from the pain. He didn't have enough time to react.

Sam just turned around and nonchalantly walked away. "**Don't be a macho man**, Fred-dork," Sam called out.

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><p><strong>Dance With Me by: Drew Seeley ft. Belinda<strong>

It was prom night, and to Carly, the night air was magical. Here she was dressed up like a Disney princess with her prince Lorenzo Roselli – the hottest and kindest guy in the whole school – and he was her boyfriend.

Most of the night, it was just Lorenzo and Carly. Sometimes they talked to their friends, but it was their night completely and therefore the majority of it was spent in each other's arms.

Then the magic rose to its peak as a slow dance was being played, and in Lorenzo's most gentleman-sounding voice, he asked, "May I have this dance, Carly?"

Butterflies fluttered in Carly's stomach, and her cheeks flushed. "Sure. I love to."

Lorenzo gently placed his hands on Carly's waist, and Carly wrapped her arms around Lorenzo's neck, and together their bodies swayed as one to a love song. Not one word was uttered, but as they stared into their eyes, a million things were said between them. Carly felt like she was dancing on air. _**Whatever you do, don't wake me up**__, _Carl thought as she tried to convince herself that this was all real. _I __**know the feeling's real. I won't let it stop, no**__._

As if reading her mind through her eyes, Lorenzo whispered, "**We're floating on the clouds. If I could, I never come back down**."

"Ever since I was little, I always dreamed about my prom. In my fantasy prom, I wore the most beautiful dress and only my favorite songs were played. Oh, and it was held in a ballroom of a castle, but most of all, I had the perfect man with me" Carly blushed. "**My dreams have come true.**"

Lorenzo chuckled. "**Girl, it's just you and me, dancing in this dream**."

Then they kissed.

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><p><strong>B.Y.O.B. by: System of a Down<strong>

Sam's cousin Joe was throwing a "just gotten out of jail" party for her cousin James, was arrested for arson, this Saturday night. Sam had blackmailed her cousin Joe to let her and Carly attend. Now there was just one problem: convincing Carly to attend.

"Come on, Carly," Sam whined.

"No, Sam," Carly said like a soldier.

"**Everybody's going to the party have a real good time**," Sam tried to convince Carly.

"I said, 'no,' Sam" Carly curtly said.

"**Dancing in the desert blowing up the sunshine**," Sam tried to entice her with dancing and fun.

"What part of 'no' don't you understand?"

"All of it."

"Then let me explain why," Carly said, patience wearing thin, "all of your family's parties involve drugs, alcohol, or an all out brawl. I don't want to get mixed up in that."

"I'll protect you from it. Just stick with me."

Carly actually thought about it. Sam smiled so she continued to edge her on. "You're my best friend, Carly, and this is a celebration for my cousin who was finally released from the evil legal system. I want you – and only you – to be there with me in celebrating this awesome moment."

Carly knew she couldn't deny Sam for long. She sighed. "Oh, all right."

Sam jumped up in glee. "**Blast off, it's party time**!" She ran to the kitchen to celebrate with some meatballs.

Carly only looked on while Sam happily ran to the kitchen, and horrifically asked herself, "What have I done?"

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><p><strong>Author's Note: You can read about the party and the aftermath in Chapters 3 and 4 of my fanfiction <em>Fake Friends, Real Friends<em>**

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><p><strong>Low by: Flo Rida ft. T-Pain<strong>

Gibby was at a club (the same club Spencer and Alex were at a few weeks ago) dancing without his shirt. "Gibby _like,_" he said to himself as he shook his half-naked body to an upbeat song.

But Gibby's dancing ceased when she entered. "Whoah!" It was a tall girl around sixteen with pretty legs and beautiful brown eyes and luscious, rich brown hair with a smile that can brighten up any corner. **Shawty had them Apple Bottom Jeans, boots with the fur. The whole club was lookin' at her. Then she hit the floor. Next thing you know, Shawty got low.** While her sexual appeal made Gibby's dancing stop, her dance moves made his heart stop, "Whoah! Shawty can move it!"

Then, looking at Gibby straight in the eyes, **she turned around and gave that big booty a smack.** Gibby took this as his moment as he strided over to her to dance with her. "Hey, Shawty," Gibby flirted with his gangsta talk, "You got a name, beautiful?"

The girl giggled. "Tasha."

"Then, sexy woman, let me shownin' my dance moves."

Tasha giggled, and the two rocked out on the dance floor often getting down low, and eventually they became a couple.

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><p><strong>If you like this and like Transformers (movie), then check out my Transformers ten song chalenge fic called <em>War Anthem. <em>It's more darker and more action packed.**


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